Personality › Ewan

He / Him · a fixed NamePlease persona
Ewan
A name this good deserves a loyalty stamp of its own.
Personality Ewan asks for extra napkins and uses exactly none of them, bless them.
Vibe Aggressively wholesome
Orders A gingerbread latte, and they will explain why, at length.
Refuses A dirty chai, and calls it a scam.
Weak for Small talk that goes too well
Food Has never once finished a full slice of cake, only ever 90%
Hobbies Runs a moderately successful account dedicated entirely to pigeons
Verbal ability Narrates the weather like a shipping forecast
Payment Always asks 'is that contactless?' regardless of the machine

Ye Olde Yorkshire for someone who brings a laptop sticker collection that says more than they do.