Personality › Desmond

He / Him · a fixed NamePlease persona
Desmond
Congratulations, you've been rebranded.
Personality Desmond asks for extra napkins and uses exactly none of them, bless them.
Vibe Eternally mid-sip
Orders A decaf flat white, and they will explain why, at length.
Refuses A vanilla latte, actively, at every opportunity.
Weak for Loyalty stamps
Food Eats a whole lemon slice from their water, on a dare nobody made
Hobbies Keeps a life list of birds seen exclusively from bus windows
Verbal ability Over-enunciates certain words for reasons nobody has identified
Payment Keeps emergency cash in a shoe, and admits this freely

Old English for someone who will absolutely steal the good armchair if you look away.